PILGRIMAGE OF HOLINESS | KAIROS GLOBAL | MARCH 2024

Author: Anil Israel

Intro: Catholic marriage is a call to holiness, writes Anil Israel, and one in which prayer plays a vital role. 

When we think of vocation, we tend to think in terms of religious vocation – to be a priest in a parish or a nun in a convent. When we think of saints, we are mostly inclined to think that those who are called to a consecrated way of life are the ones exclusively privileged to adorn the medal of holiness – to be considered to be crowned with sainthood. Have we ever realised that marriage too is a vocation? Thankfully there are a handful of married saints too.

When we look at the Holy Family, we have the model of holiness projected before us. We might even classify them as special category – that they had unique divine grace, for they were entrusted with an exclusive weighted responsibility, to be the earthly parents of God’s own son, Jesus. Even when we look at Joachim and Ann, we could place them too in a similar compartment, that they too had a major mission to raise up Mary, the Blessed mother of our Lord. Likewise we can say the same for Zachariah and Elizabeth in favour of John the Baptist.

Holy Scripture shares the lives of other married men and women who lived exemplary lives doing God’s holy will. In the New Testament, St Paul has repeatedly mentioned Priscilla and Aquila in his writings. They are among the earliest known Christian missionaries in the first century. St Luke records that they explained the Way of God more accurately (Acts 18:26) to Apollos who himself was well versed in Scriptures (Acts 18:24). This holy couple can therefore be considered an outstanding role-model, encouraging all couples to be deep rooted in the Word of God. Priscilla and Aquila are venerated as holy martyrs and their feast is on July 8.

Italian paediatrician, St Gianna Beretta Molla, is known to have refused abortion when her life was threatened during pregnancy with her fourth child. She died a week after giving birth to her daughter Gianna Emanuela. St Gianna’s pro-life stand reminds us to choose life (Deuteronomy 30:19) come what may. Her life truly proclaimed: glorify God with your body (1 Corinthians 6:20). ‘Our body is a cenacle, a monstrance: through its crystal the world should see God’ (St Gianna Beretta Molla).

A call to Catholic marriage, is a supreme call to openness to life – to welcome children lovingly – to respect and defend life. By saying ‘yes’ to life, parents co-operate with God’s magnificent act of marvellous creation. The exquisite joy of parenthood is an invitation to partake in the divine mission of raising a godly family – a domestic church. Couples are thereby encouraged to imitate the pursuit of holy family life. Scripture too affirms: women will be saved through bearing children (1 Timothy 2:15). 

Welcoming children lovingly equates to welcoming the God-given mission of nurturing saints for Mother Church. Raising children along the path that leads to God, is a God-given task which can be accomplished only by depending on divine assistance. Responsible parenthood therefore implies that couples ought to make prayer an integral part of their family life. ‘The family that prays together, stays together’ (Ven. Fr Patrick Peyton CSC). 

In addition to family prayer time, husbands and wives also need to exclusively set apart individual time for inevitable personal prayer. This is essential for one’s own progress in personal holiness. Interceding for one’s own spouse and children is part of the responsibility of saying ‘yes’ to holy family life. St Monica is said to have prayed for thirty years for her son. The result is St Augustine – a Doctor of the Church. Job had seven sons and three daughters (Job 1:2). He made it his duty to rise early in the morning and offer burnt offerings (Job 1:5). Praying for one’s family is a powerful act of love.

If married life calls for a significant portion of prayer life, shouldn’t one already begin a prayer life - way before entering into marriage? Tobit and Sarah are said to have prayed together before getting married. They implored that the Lord may grant them mercy and safety (Tobit 8:4) Grant that I may find mercy and may grow old together with her (Tobit 8:7). Praying together as a couple is the heartbeat of every Catholic marriage.

For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I in the midst of them (Matthew 18:19). This biblical promise is meant to be claimed by all couples. Praying together powerfully strengthens the bond of love that is essential for the unity, integrity and joyful witnessing of their gospel-rooted married life.

Many people enter into marriage in the hope of finding solution to lot of life’s problems. Marriage is not to be perceived as an end in itself. It is rather an earthly means to a far greater spiritual end – eternal bliss – oneness with the Divine. The goal of marriage is not happiness – ‘and they lived happily ever after’ as all fairy-tale stories tend to suggest. The aim of Catholic marriage is holiness. 

Blesseds Luigi and Maria Quattrocchi (feast day November 25 – their wedding anniversary), Saints Louis and Zelie Martin (feast day July 12) have set the trend for all Catholic couples to follow. ‘To be saints is not a privilege for a few, but a vocation for everyone’ (Pope Francis). Catholic marriage is a vocation – that provides the platform for one to exercise their fundamental vocation to love and embrace their universal vocation to holiness. It is a journey for one to grow and attain Christian maturity in their pursuit of perfection in virtue. It is a pilgrimage of grace – a pilgrimage of love – a pilgrimage of holiness. 

‘Holiness is not a luxury for the few; it is not just for some people. It is meant for you and for me and for all of us. It is a simple duty, because if we learn to love, we learn to be holy’ (Mother Teresa). The call to holy family life is a call to raising a family of saints. Have I accepted the God-given responsibility to help my spouse and children to reach their eternal destination – heaven?