JOYFUL GAZE INTO THE LORD'S GRACE | KAIROS GLOBAL | JANUARY 2024

Author: Emily Sangeetha

Intro: Emily Sangeetha reflects upon weakness together with the verse 2 Corinthians 12:9.

Weakness is always a stumbling block in our journey, pulling us backward and cluttering our minds with worry. Confronting weakness besets us with a restless urgency to get rid of it, or it slowly shadows our conversations with complaints. Here we are reminded of Martha in the Gospel of Luke who frets over being weak in doing the chores alone, but the memory of this verse brings in consolation through the words of Jesus, Martha, Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many things. But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her. These verses throw light on the need to see where our gaze is fixed upon. Looking into and brooding over weakness leads to despair whereas being aware of the Lord's presence and being open to him transforms into a joyful acceptance of failures and inabilities, welcoming his grace to work in us. 

For years I had been troubled by my weakness and my efforts to overcome it had left me tired and irritated, curbing me from experiencing the freedom extended by the Lord. My gaze seemed to be drooping into my weakness until God interfered and led me to gaze up into his eternal presence and know the Word of God work in me: My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9). 

As a homemaker I spend a considerable amount of time in the kitchen, the things and events in the kitchen often lure me to meditative thoughts and I consider this as the work of the Holy Spirit. My inability to view my weakness as a door to grace was beautifully transformed by a thought initiated by a steel mug. The mug was peculiar because whenever tea was poured, it would spill through the sides creating a mess. The sparkling countertop would be left dirty, but this time I thought of this mug as my heart with weakness and tea as the grace of our Lord. It was so consoling to see that whenever this weakness came up, it would leave traces of God's grace. 

My inability to patiently teach children underwent a peaceful and effortless transformation as I repeated to myself that His grace was sufficient for me. My failures in accepting others also changed with the realisation that God's grace at work in us always is sufficient in accepting and loving others as they are. The wonderful change was that I was able to be grateful for the weaknesses in my kids as I realised that it was an alley to encounter. Whenever I happened to see their failures I would pray asking the Lord to make use of it to know and experience him. 

When I look back I can see that my complaints have been erased as my thoughts dwell not on weakness but on His mighty presence and filling grace as we read in Psalms 81:10, I am the Lord your God, who brought you up out of the land of Egypt. Open your mouth wide and I will fill it.

Emily Sangeetha is a homemaker settled in Bangalore, India with her husband and their three daughters. She is also a catechist and a blogger, sharing her experiences and insights at emilysanecdotes@wordpress.com.