RUNNING TO THE PROPRIETOR OF ALL JOY | KAIROS GLOBAL | JUNE 2022

Author: Sr Sunitha Ruby CCR

Intro: Sr Sunitha Ruby CCR shares some practical ways in which we can retain our peace and composure when situations try otherwise. 

When something goes wrong, I quickly become alert and withdraw to a private space where I can be on my own. I believe that every person is created with ample strength to heal themselves, and our tiny efforts to nourish it, help. I know that my religious vows have also added to this grace.

Still, I find it tough to remain composed in a group, when something goes wrong for me. I seek out a space of my own to weed out the negative thoughts and feelings. Otherwise, I may disturb the whole group. 

When I was young, I used to write about what I was going through, rather than tell a third person about it. This helped me a lot. Jotting down short poems about how I felt was another technique I practised earlier. This helped me to remain cheerful. 

Nowadays, I have developed a special friendship with the Holy Spirit and he helps perfectly in situations of all sorts. The Holy Spirit has turned out to be my most reliable friend of all time. I have a favourite prayer to the Holy Spirit that I recite often to keep our friendship alive. Repeating the following Bible verses promising the Holy Spirit also helps me experience the strength of the friend I possess.

And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper [the Holy Spirit], to be with you forever (John 14:16).

For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, these are sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out, ‘Abba, Father’ (Romans 8:13, 14).

The Paraclete, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you everything and remind you of all I have said to you (John 14:25-26).

When the Paraclete comes, whom I shall send to you from the Father, the Spirit of truth who issues from the Father, he will be my witness (John 15:26).

For the Holy Spirit will teach you in that very hour what you ought to say (Luke 12:12).

And as well as this, the Spirit too comes to help us in our weakness, for, when we do not know how to pray properly, then the Spirit personally makes our petitions for us in groans that cannot be put into words (Romans 8:26-27).

Affirmative self-talk before the Blessed Sacrament is another self-healing technique which refreshes my soul. I tell and teach myself how precious I am to my God, and how special I was created to glorify God. Repeating this over and over slowly tunes my brain and thoughts in a holy direction.

But there are times when deep hurt can turn me upside-down, where neither my convictions nor faith practises help get over. In such situations, I have a way to deal with it. I write the name of the person hurting me on a piece of paper and direct all my anger and frustration I have towards them on the paper; finally I burn that paper up. This is a stress buster which works for me. All this drama is followed by a calming down at adoration, where I surrender them as well myself completely to the Lord and go for confession seeking forgiveness. Praying for the gift of forgiveness has become a routine as forgiving naturally is not an easy task.

Having small hobbies like drawing and writing also brightens my day. I have taken one vow where in a conflict, the initiative to reconcile will be mine, even if the fault lies elsewhere. This effort to forgive will cleanse my soul and heal the relationship. 

I have no reason to worry anymore when I have the proprietor of all joy and peace in this world as my best friend – my Lord Jesus.

Sr Sunitha Ruby CCR is a counsellor psychotherapist and life skill trainer. She is also a researcher at the University of Kerala, India.