CONTINENCE FOR THE KINGDOM OF HEAVEN | KAIROS GLOBAL | APRIL 2023

Author: Nicholas Koeppel 

Intro: Nicholas Koeppel helps us understand the first of the two vocations to love: continence for the kingdom of God.

In the previous three articles, I provided an outline of the first three chapters of Theology of the Body. Essentially this was covering the main points of St. John Paul’s ‘adequate anthropology’ – a biblical study of the meaning of being human, the meaning of being a body, created male and female in the image of God. We considered the three words of Christ when he appealed to ‘the Beginning’, when he appealed to ‘the Human Heart’, and when he appealed to ‘the future resurrection’. Today, we take up a new topic – continence for the kingdom of heaven.

This topic necessarily follows the first three chapters. After we know our identity (human anthropology) then we discover our mission. Once we know who we are, according to how God sees us, then we know how we are to live – what is our mission. In the Christian life, there are two primary vocations to love: continence for the Kingdom of Heaven and the Sacrament of Marriage. Both of these vocations are a living out of the same spousal meaning of the body (that we discussed in chapter 1). Before talking about marriage in the next 2 articles, I will focus this article on celibacy.

Celibacy, or continence for the kingdom of heaven, is chosen by someone with a supernatural motivation for this choice, it is made ‘for the sake of the kingdom of heaven.’ Therefore celibacy requires a special grace from God to live it out. Human effort alone will not suffice, but only through prayer and the gift of God can someone fulfil the responsibilities of this state of life. First of all, someone chooses this way of life in imitation of Christ. Jesus is the primary example of someone who lived celibacy, as well as Mary and Joseph (we will discuss their marriage more in a little while). Jesus lived his own life unmarried, in a life of celibacy, and he also taught about it. In Matthew 19:11-12, Jesus taught that some make themselves ‘eunuchs’ for the kingdom of heaven. He was indicating the kind of sacrifice someone who chooses this way of life will have to make. Marriage is something very good, designed by God from the beginning. The one who chooses to forgo this good of marriage, in order to choose the good life of celibacy, must do so with a sacrifice that is necessarily involved that goes along with leaving behind all that is in married and family life.

The one who chooses celibacy on earth is a sign to everyone of the life we will all live in heaven. As we discussed before, in heaven, with our resurrected bodies, we will all live the fullness of the spousal meaning of our bodies in the ‘face to face’ beatific vision of God in his Trinitarian communion of persons: Father, Son and Holy Spirit. God will be ‘all in all’. Marriage will no longer exist because it is a reality only of this earth. In heaven, everyone will be ‘celibate’ because God will be their spouse. Those who choose celibacy now on earth are living this way of life in anticipation of heaven. They are a sign to us.

When Jesus taught about celibacy, he was teaching to an audience of Jewish people who had primarily valued married life and children. When Jesus came, he taught them a new possibility of life – a life of continence for the kingdom of heaven. This way of life would be more deeply understood as the centuries passed and more people lived this way of life in the Church. A primary example of celibacy is the life of Mary and Joseph. As Catholic we believe they had a true marriage and yet still also remained celibate for the kingdom of heaven all their lives. Mary is ‘perpetually virgin’. Their marriage was a true communion of persons, and they also gave themselves totally to God in celibacy. Their fruitfulness was one of the Spirit, so much so that Mary ‘conceived of the Holy Spirit’ (Matthew 1:18). All those who choose the life of celibacy are called to a spiritual fruitfulness – to be spiritual mothers and spiritual fathers. Parents who give physical life to new children are also called to spiritual motherhood and fatherhood through the education and formation of their children.

In the Church there has been a traditional teaching that ‘celibacy’ is superior to ‘marriage’. St Paul says the one who chooses marriage ‘does well’ and the one who chooses celibacy ‘does better’ (1 Corinthians 7:38). How are we to understand this? St John Paul II has some very helpful insights in the Theology of the Body. First of all, he says the superiority must be understood within the limits of the complementarity of marriage and celibacy. Both of these vocations and ways of life are needed in the Christian community. Both of them complement and shed light on each other. A married couple reveals to the celibacy person the intimate and faithful love he should have towards God. A celibate person reveals to a married couple that their love is meant to lead them into union and relationship with God himself. Both are necessary. Traditionally in the Church, the life of celibacy has been called the ‘way of perfection’. This is because celibate persons follow most closely the three evangelical counsels of poverty, chastity, and obedience, and in this way they imitate Christ and become more perfect. (Married couples are also called to live the spirit of these counsels through marital chastity, poverty of spirit, and obedience and submission to one another). However, St John Paul II makes an important point here. He says that the measure of all Christian life is charity. In the end, we will ultimately be judged by how much we love. So this means that someone in the way of life called the ‘life of perfection’ could be less perfect than someone who is living the married life because of the amount of love they have. We will be judged by our love.

Ultimately, in choosing our vocation, each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another (1 Corinthians 7:7), St Paul says. Therefore, even if the way of life of celibacy is ‘objectively’ higher, each of us should choose the vocation that is ‘subjectively’ best for us. We each have our own gift from God. What is the motivation for choosing to give up marriage and choose a life of celibacy? It is ‘love’. The person who chooses ‘continence for the kingdom of heaven’ does so as a response to the love of the Divine Bridegroom, Jesus Christ, who gives himself away totally in love to His Bride on the Cross and in the Eucharist. The celibate person is responding to this love – saying yes to it and receiving this gift of God, and making a total gift of him or herself back to God.

So if you are discerning your vocation, you have two fundamental options: a life of marriage or a life of celibacy. If you choose celibacy, if God is calling you to that life, then he will give you the grace to live it out. Celibacy can be lived in many ways including as a religious brother or sister, a priest, a single consecrated person, etc. The important thing to ask is ‘how can I best make a gift of myself?’ With my talents and abilities God has given me, where can I best be of service? Have time of prayer and silence and ask God to show you, to reveal his will for your life. When you live in Love, life has meaning and purpose and you will be happy. In the next two articles, I will focus on the other way of living out the spousal meaning of the body and we will discover together what St John Paul II says about the sacrament of marriage.

Nicholas Koeppel, serving on the leadership team for ‘Theology of the Body Educators’ seeks to spread the teachings of St John Paul II around the world through talks, retreats, and online courses in Theology of the Body. Originally from Missouri, USA, he currently works for the Ukrainian Catholic University, Lviv, Ukraine and the John Paul II University in Krakow, Poland as an English instructor and a TOB teacher.